Ok, so part of my current health status has to do with the fact that I suffer from some pretty serious food cravings and a pretty serious lack of control. When I was younger, I think most of this went unchecked because I was relatively active, etc. but now in my old age (late 20s, hahaha) it is all catching up with me.
So on this Weight Watchers journey, I have really been trying to teach myself about control. Since I know I have to track everything I eat, I have mostly avoided cravings out of the sheer humiliation factor of trying to figure out how many points are in a quarter pounder and fries from McDonald's. I have done relatively well. I have mostly made myself figure out hunger from boredom. But there are still those lingering cravings, and last night was one of them.
So I ended up spending most of the night at home alone because Diablo III came out so Jennings had gone to his friend's house to play it together. We had already eaten dinner and I had already used up my points for the day. All I had to do before bed was some laundry, so in between loads I watched TV. Bad idea. I really think a big factor in my cravings has to do with how many food commercials there are on late night TV. It also doesn't help that I watch shows like Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives and The Best Thing I Ever Ate. So there I am minding my own business and this voice in my head says, "You need tater tots." I tell myself, "That's ridiculous, you already ate for tonight, you're not hungry." But the voice persisted, "You need tater tots with CHILI and CHEESE on them." Ugh. I tried to reason with myself, I paced around the room, I even looked in every cabinet in my kitchen and in my fridge (as if I would magically have that somewhere). So for the better part of 2 hours I fought a mental battle with myself over CHILI CHEESE TOTS. And you know what?
All I ended up doing was eating a tablespoon of peanut butter. You know how many points that is? Only 3. Instead of the 9 point chili cheese tots that would only make me feel awful.
Yes, it's embarrassing, but I am counting this as a win.